Joseph Massad has tenure

I have a message to all the Zionist hoodlums out there: for all of you who campaigned and harassed and intimidated and who treated academic life like an aspect of Zionist thuggery, Joseph Massad has received tenure. He called me yesterday from Cairo to break the great news to me and I could not wait to report it to his enemies and mine. It is with great pleasure and gratification that I break the news to all of you. No matter what dirty tricks you (i.e. Zionist hoodlums) have resorted to, and no matter what sleazy methods you have employed and no matter what sinister propaganda you have resorted to, dear Joseph Massad deservedly received his tenure. I am looking forward to Joseph's contribution to Middle East studies at Columbia and elsewhere. And as `Abdun-Nasser told the colonial power back in 1956, I say: if you don't like this news please feel free to go and drink from the Mediterrenean sea.