Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I dread Ramadan for several reasons: 1) all those religious shows and clerics on Arabic TV; 2) Arab leaders increase their pretensions of piety; 3) the rhetoric of Hamas and House of Saud and Hizbullah increases the citations from the Qur'an; 4) you watch all those scenes of wonderful Middle East food and we have none of that here in northern California; 5) people will pay less attention to Suha Arafat; 6) I will have to watch as Bush poses as culturally sensitive leader, posing with those leaders of lousy Muslim and Arab American organizations in DC; 7) I hate it when people answer the simple question of "Are you fasting" by saying "If God is willing." To that, I always say: No, you decide if you are fasting or not. Cut it out; 8) People who fast will not be able to consume potatoes during the day, and that hurts my feelings; 9) the issuance of fatwawawawas will increase substantially; 10) US news will air more stories on madrasssaaaaaaassaaa; 11) Saudi King will be compelled to read from a speech that no one will understand--not even him; 12) Muslim/Arab masses will remember to express their outrage at Danish cartoons and less--much less--at injustices.
PS Since I don't observe any religion, I will make sure to make people hungry throughout the day in the hope of breaking their fast prematurely. Enjoy.