Shibli Al-Mallat, the crackpot presidnetial candidate of Lebanon, whose chances of success are smaller than my chances of winning the US Senate in California, continues his gestures of prostration. Having previously prostrated himself before the Maronite Matriarch, Ghasssan Tuwayni, and Walid Jumblat, today he crowns his achievements by a pathetically obseqious letter to Rafiq Hariri--yes, to Rafiq not Sa`d--printed on the first page of the Hariri rag, Al-Mustaqbal. He even compares the asceticism of Ghandi to the wealth of Hariri. Yes, I kid you not. And then, the "Mallat for President" shop in Beirut, sent me--me of all people--a press release containing the latest piece that Mallat wrote for the Daily Star. It began as follows: "No doubt the Mehlis report, to be released today, will constitute a landmark for the history of both Syria and Lebanon." History of Syria and Lebanon only? Is he not understating his case? I say that the report was a "landmark" for the history of the Middle East. No, I think that he meant to say that this was a landmark for the history of Asia. No, in fact, it was a landmark for the history of the world. No, no, no. This report was really a landmark for human history. In fact, if you think about it, it was really landmark for the history of the universe. Really. I am not exaggerating. I mean, which was more of a landmark: WWII or the Mehlis report? The Mehlis report, of course. I can't believe that you would even ask.