Count Me Out: If Bush and the Lebanese right-wing opposition are for freedom, then I oppose freedom; if Hariri is Mr. Lebanon--as Robert Fisk calls him--then I support Mr./Ms. Potato Head as Prime Minister for Lebanon; if Islamic fundamentalism has answers for Middle East problems, then I want the problems to be unsolved; if Syria and North Korea are "democracies" then I oppose democracies; if the Iraq war was about "liberation", then I oppose liberation; if the Nation magazine stands for Justice in the Middle East, then I oppose Justice in the Middle East; if Feminist Majority represents Feminism, then I oppose feminism; if Kofi Annan represents "international legitimacy" then I oppose international legitimacy; if Jesse Jackson speaks for the downtrodden, then I oppose the downtrodden; if Larry King is supposed to be entertaining, then I want to be bored; if King Fahd is the Guardian of the Two Holy Sites, then I do not want the Holy Sites to be guarded; and if Israel is a "light unto the nations", I want to sink in darkness, NOW.